Pendulum Swings

I haven't been knitting as much in the last year as I did in the years before. Since dating my honey, my crafting time has decreased. It's not exactly his fault, mind you- mostly it's because I actually get to bed at a reasonable hour now, so I no longer knit every night ::cough between 11pm and 2am::. He knew he was marrying a crafter, and he is pretty darn supportive. I have a craft room, and he'll even watch dancing shows with me on the television while I knit. But I've cut down on the amount of crafting at home, and my commute is just so much shorter than it was a few years ago that overall I have just been... anxious. Missing it. Wishing I could knit more. Regretting that I didn't feel like I had the time to swatch and start new projects, so I just kept going with big long-term ones that wouldn't require the initial start-up concentration, and wouldn't require me being alone to begin them.

So I thought maybe I'd take back a little time for myself. And I have. I cast on for the Hemlock Ring blanket, which is just a breeze to knit, and a total delight on big big needles. I'm using the Eco Wool, and am astonished by how soft the fiber is, and how beautifully it's knitting up. I also spent a lot of time swatching for a little knit top in one of the RYC 4plys (cotton, I think)... and just couldn't get the pattern to work right. So I switched over to swatching for a cotton Dalegarn tunic, in their Svale yarn, which is luckily going much better. I've finished the ribbing and am a good ways into the first pattern repeat. And as splitty as I'm finding the Svale yarn (4 ply cotton again, though at larger gauge), I'm so delighted by the raspberry color that I'm able to forgive it. And my mood? So much better. I'm no longer constantly worried about the wedding. I have had pleasant wedding dreams, instead of nightmares. I am still freaked about costs and details, but generally feeling like we're doing good, and that the world is good, and darn if I'm not happy to be knitting more again. And I've nearly finished the ironing of all the fabric for my next project, which is a bonus- I am probably the slowest iron-er in the world, so I'm glad that my pile is finally decreasing enough that I can actually cut out the patterns!

It's not a perfect world- by focusing more on sewing, and knitting, and spending time on the sofa or upstairs in my craft room, I have let things go around the house. Haven't pulled my weight enough during the week, especially on the nights I have picked going to the gym over cooking a real meal, or when I chose to watch So You Think You Can Dance while casting on over bothering to vacuum or do the laundry. I didn't need to be sitting around watching TV and scrutinizing the Hemlock Ring directions. But in a way? I did need to do that. I need to feel the wool pass through my fingers. I need to try new things, and get out of this project monogamy, in order to feel creatively sated and calmed.

But what I also need to do is learn a little moderation. I need to remember that we share a household, and share the responsibilities. Sometimes I need to knit that one row before I go upstairs and make the bed. But my life is better when I do that one row. I just need to remember to put the knitting down after a bit. It will still be there when the immediate task is complete, and the room is tidied. And then the reward is greater- I can sink back into the sofa without guilt, and my favorite person might even sit down next to me and enjoy the peace and gentle rythym of my clicking needles with me. I never have been good at moderating my pendulum swings. I spend an entire day cleaning the windows, or an entire day watching Battlestar Gallactica on DVD while working on a baby blanket. I go to the gym with great frequency, and run often, or I forget about my need for fitness entirely and go a week without even lifting weights. Finding a middle ground has never been my strong suit- it is appropriate that as a Libra I always seek balance, but have a hard time determining where that balance is. So that's my goal for the near future. I won't let the pendulum swing back to a world where I don't knit enough for my mental well-being. But neither can I ignore the very real domestic world I live in. Knitting more lately gives me the optimism to think doing both is a real possibility, so I'm going to take my enthusiasm and run with it! Conveniently I have an external motivating factor- another parental visit in a few weeks. I'd like to be able to show Mom some movement on the DIY projects for the wedding, as well as showing her that we can maintain a perfectly lovely and (tidy enough) home.

I'm curious to hear from my fellow crafters. How do you maintain balance between your chores and your desires? How do you remind yourself to stop with the one, to pursue the other?